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    DOUBLE ALBUM TRACK LIST 
    Album 1  (English: There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved） 
    1. Out of clock 
    2. Only Man 
    3. Love Yourself First 
    4. Another Me 
    5. Distance 
    6. Beg For More 
    7. I refused to Break Down 
    8. Alchemist 
    9. I’m Enough 
    10. Dream On 
    11. Stay Away 
    12. Another Me (Acapella) 
     
    Album 2  (Chinese: 心葬) 
    1. 来不及 （Out of clock） 
    2. 流尘 （Only Man） 
    3. 自爱（Love Yourself First） 
    4. 另一个我 （Another Me） 
    5. 距离 （Distance） 
    6. 金石为开 （Alchemist） 
    7. 足够 （I’m Enough） 
    8. 梦之爱恋 （Dream On） 
    9. 离开你 （Stay Away） 
    10. 零度空间 (QFT) 
    11.  唯美 （Art For Art's Sake） 
    12. 另一个我  Another Me (无伴奏) 

    Album Concept
    In the creation of my double album, 'There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved (心葬),' I ventured into the depths of my soul, where music thrived while other passions withered. This journey, spanning five years of solitary writing, recording, and producing, gave birth to a series of heart-rending ballads. These songs are woven with the essence of lost loves, their spectral presences finding solace in the album's melodies. This work is not just a collection of songs; it's a healing ritual, a poignant invitation to find joy in the aftermath of sorrow, an endeavour to craft something that resonates beyond the constraints of time.
     
    Story and Sound 
    This double album mirrors my cultural duality, split evenly between English and Chinese, reflecting my Chinese-British heritage. It's a musical memoir, chronicling the loves and lives that have shaped me. The album delves into the paradox of strength in vulnerability, exploring how our deepest wounds often teach the most profound lessons. Out of over a hundred demos, I handpicked each track for its emotional resonance, ensuring that every piece touched me deeply from inception to completion. The production leans into a distinctly feminine, vocal-centric aesthetic, a reflection of my expertise as a female producer. A transformative ayahuasca retreat in 2019, guided by a Peruvian Shaman, inspired me to harness the raw, unfiltered power of the voice – the most intimate and potent instrument of the soul.
     
    Album Artwork: Life-Size Painting 
     
    The concept of commissioning my esteemed friend and supporter, Shane Rodrigues, to create a life-size hyper-realism acrylic painting stems from my desire to honour the years dedicated to crafting this double album as a 'sonic painting'.
    Dylan Chubb, whom I had the fortune of meeting during the 2019 Ayahuasca retreat, serves as the art director and photographer for this album. Additionally, my graphic designer, Eric from Kahinienn Graphix, transitioned from being an admirer of my work to a pivotal collaborator, working closely with me on a daily basis.
     
    A Deeper Journey: Pain, Acceptance and Transcendence 
    The album is a portrait of human condition archetypes, presented as a collection of unrequited love stories from the perspective of a woman who tragically and willingly enters romantic affairs doomed from the start. In a way, she has crafted her own narratives and repeatedly played the same role ritualistically, yet remains unaware of the reasons.
    She cycles through a pattern of attachment and detachment, with each encounter and departure symbolising love as an elusive flame, ultimately extinguished like a dream from the day before. In her songs, she narrates these tales while seeking answers and, ultimately, transcendence. She embraces the pain of each chosen experience, but must heal her wounds in solitude, thus invariably leaving each situation and returning to her inherent state of otherworldliness.
    This explains why she conducts a funeral ritual for every man she once truly loved, only to inevitably forget and erase him from her heart. Despite her vulnerable, feminine, and melancholic exterior, she possesses an indomitable strength, allowing her to engage with love earnestly each time, and prepare herself for the next emotional adventure or life's upheaval.
    People of all genders may find a piece of themselves in her at different times, as she embodies the collective consciousness: fear, pain, insecurity, lust, loss, disappointment, suffering, loneliness, and the longing to be loved. The sequence of pain she endures symbolises the unenlightened egoic state of human conditions — that of conditional love.
    Emotionally, I became her while writing these songs
     
    This album is dedicated to all who have endured heartbreak, pain, and suffering. Let us collectively hold funerals for our pains and embark on a journey of healing together.
    I take immense pride in this album, so much so that if I were to pass away tomorrow, I would do so content. However, as long as I am alive, it is both my duty and honor to share this work with you and the world.
    For most of my life, becoming the music artist I am today seemed an unattainable dream. This is why I urge you to liberate yourself and live your truth, regardless of your circumstances or age.

    Includes unlimited streaming of There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.     ... more
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about

"I’m Enough" speaks to the strength and resilience of the human spirit in the face of heartache and disillusionment. The lyrics poignantly capture the journey of coming to terms with a love that has faded, and the realisation that one's self-worth isn't defined by another's presence or absence.

The song begins with the acknowledgment of a partner's words no longer holding the same trust and belief as before, symbolising a relationship that has lost its essence. It explores the theme of finding closure, moving on from the mirages of a once vibrant love, now turned into a mere illusion.

Musically, "I’m Enough" balances a sense of melancholy with an empowering undertone, reflecting the dual nature of grief and self-empowerment. The track is a declaration of independence and self-acceptance, affirming that despite the pain and loss, one is still whole, still enough.

It's about transforming the pain of unrequited love and broken promises into a personal anthem of strength and resilience. The song ends on a note of triumph, embracing the beauty of one's individuality and the eternal nature of one's inner melody and song.

lyrics

I’m Enough

You said ‘I’m right here’
My heart in a dilated soul
Waiting for luck
I hear the words so far no love
I’m nothing to you
Nothing to you
Nothing to…nothing to you

Am I not enough to keep you dreaming?
You don’t talk to me anymore
You call somebody else ‘babe’

Your silence is louder than words
you tried your best to hide it
Never thought it would end like this
Don’t make me think, my love, I wasn’t even close anyway
Am I not enough to stay forever?
And to be your lover
To be your lover
To be your one and only
any night I’d get through it
You try to hide but you’ve fallen out of love with me

But I’m enough, I’m enough, I’m enough

No one could hurt me
Unless when I let you in
So Where are you now?
I hear no words, no call, no love
I got nothing to hold on
Nothing to hold on to

Am I not enough to keep you dreaming?
Don’t you want me anymore
Don’t you wanna be with me ‘babe’

This silence is louder than war
Love dies in a heartbeat
I wonder if you’d ever feel like this
You will never take away what I have earned from betrayal
That’s turned into melodies that stay forever
And to be my lover
be my lover
be my one and only
I will shed a million tears

I’m enough, I’m enough, I’m enough

credits

from There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved, released February 14, 2022
Written, Vocals & Production by Fifi Rong
Mix and Mastering by Oskar Vizan

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Fifi Rong London, UK

Chinese-British vocalist, songwriter, and producer FiFi Rong blends emotional vulnerability and her cultural heritage into her Avant-Pop vision. Known for collaborations with Skepta, Tricky, and more, she's recognised for her paradigm-pushing sound and spellbinding live shows. Currently working on her 7 EP Series "Qi:7," FiFi explores past traumas and cultural ties, fostering a hopeful narrative. ... more

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