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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    DOUBLE ALBUM TRACK LIST 
    Album 1  (English: There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved) 
    1. Out of clock 
    2. Only Man 
    3. Love Yourself First 
    4. Another Me 
    5. Distance 
    6. Beg For More 
    7. I refused to Break Down 
    8. Alchemist 
    9. I’m Enough 
    10. Dream On 
    11. Stay Away 
    12. Another Me (Acapella) 
     
    Album 2  (Chinese: 心葬) 
    1. 来不及 (Out of clock) 
    2. 流尘 (Only Man) 
    3. 自爱(Love Yourself First) 
    4. 另一个我 (Another Me) 
    5. 距离 (Distance) 
    6. 金石为开 (Alchemist) 
    7. 足够 (I’m Enough) 
    8. 梦之爱恋 (Dream On) 
    9. 离开你 (Stay Away) 
    10. 零度空间 (QFT) 
    11.  唯美 (Art For Art's Sake) 
    12. 另一个我  Another Me (无伴奏) 

    Album Concept
    In the creation of my double album, 'There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved (心葬),' I ventured into the depths of my soul, where music thrived while other passions withered. This journey, spanning five years of solitary writing, recording, and producing, gave birth to a series of heart-rending ballads. These songs are woven with the essence of lost loves, their spectral presences finding solace in the album's melodies. This work is not just a collection of songs; it's a healing ritual, a poignant invitation to find joy in the aftermath of sorrow, an endeavour to craft something that resonates beyond the constraints of time.
     
    Story and Sound 
    This double album mirrors my cultural duality, split evenly between English and Chinese, reflecting my Chinese-British heritage. It's a musical memoir, chronicling the loves and lives that have shaped me. The album delves into the paradox of strength in vulnerability, exploring how our deepest wounds often teach the most profound lessons. Out of over a hundred demos, I handpicked each track for its emotional resonance, ensuring that every piece touched me deeply from inception to completion. The production leans into a distinctly feminine, vocal-centric aesthetic, a reflection of my expertise as a female producer. A transformative ayahuasca retreat in 2019, guided by a Peruvian Shaman, inspired me to harness the raw, unfiltered power of the voice – the most intimate and potent instrument of the soul.
     
    Album Artwork: Life-Size Painting 
     
    The concept of commissioning my esteemed friend and supporter, Shane Rodrigues, to create a life-size hyper-realism acrylic painting stems from my desire to honour the years dedicated to crafting this double album as a 'sonic painting'.
    Dylan Chubb, whom I had the fortune of meeting during the 2019 Ayahuasca retreat, serves as the art director and photographer for this album. Additionally, my graphic designer, Eric from Kahinienn Graphix, transitioned from being an admirer of my work to a pivotal collaborator, working closely with me on a daily basis.
     
    A Deeper Journey: Pain, Acceptance and Transcendence 
    The album is a portrait of human condition archetypes, presented as a collection of unrequited love stories from the perspective of a woman who tragically and willingly enters romantic affairs doomed from the start. In a way, she has crafted her own narratives and repeatedly played the same role ritualistically, yet remains unaware of the reasons.
    She cycles through a pattern of attachment and detachment, with each encounter and departure symbolising love as an elusive flame, ultimately extinguished like a dream from the day before. In her songs, she narrates these tales while seeking answers and, ultimately, transcendence. She embraces the pain of each chosen experience, but must heal her wounds in solitude, thus invariably leaving each situation and returning to her inherent state of otherworldliness.
    This explains why she conducts a funeral ritual for every man she once truly loved, only to inevitably forget and erase him from her heart. Despite her vulnerable, feminine, and melancholic exterior, she possesses an indomitable strength, allowing her to engage with love earnestly each time, and prepare herself for the next emotional adventure or life's upheaval.
    People of all genders may find a piece of themselves in her at different times, as she embodies the collective consciousness: fear, pain, insecurity, lust, loss, disappointment, suffering, loneliness, and the longing to be loved. The sequence of pain she endures symbolises the unenlightened egoic state of human conditions — that of conditional love.
    Emotionally, I became her while writing these songs
     
    This album is dedicated to all who have endured heartbreak, pain, and suffering. Let us collectively hold funerals for our pains and embark on a journey of healing together.
    I take immense pride in this album, so much so that if I were to pass away tomorrow, I would do so content. However, as long as I am alive, it is both my duty and honor to share this work with you and the world.
    For most of my life, becoming the music artist I am today seemed an unattainable dream. This is why I urge you to liberate yourself and live your truth, regardless of your circumstances or age.

    Includes unlimited streaming of There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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about

"Stay Away" is about the painful but necessary journey of letting go. The lyrics poignantly capture the struggle of chasing fleeting emotions and the realisation that some things cannot be held onto. It's a song about coming to terms with the heartaches of life and the resignation to its inevitabilities.

The song conveys the theme of reaching a point of no return in a relationship, where feelings have faded, and hearts are no longer aligned. It's about the courage to release the past, to let go of everything, and to utterly forget in order to move forward.

Musically, "Stay Away" combines a melancholic melody with a sense of resolve, reflecting the dual feelings of sorrow and determination. The track is a testament to the strength found in choosing to walk away from a love that no longer serves the heart.

The chorus, with its repeated resolve to leave and never look back, emphasises the finality of the decision. The song is a poignant reminder that sometimes, in the name of love, one must face the painful truth and make the hard choice to walk away, embracing the unknown future without regrets.

lyrics

Stay Away

Chasing the same high once I stumbled upon
But I never got it back
Hide in the shadows avoiding to confront
And I know it’s self-denial

Take it off
Let it go
And Put it down

Shake it off
Let it go
And put it down

Take it off
Let it go
And Put it down
I’m on the road ahead there’ nothing for me

Don’t wanna end a hollow flame to end the melancholic fade

At first it’s not a lie
It ain’t no my first to suss it out
I know it could happen to anyone

So guess I’ll stay away from you
Stay away from you
I’ll stay away from you
I’m too strange for the most
I'm too strange for the most

Take it off
Let it go
And Put it down

Shake it off
Let it go
And put it down

Take it off
Let it go
And put it down
And walk the road ahead
You’ve nothing for me

I’ve got to end this dying flame of the melancholic fate

So Guess I’ll stay away from you
Stay away from you
I’ll stay away from you
I’m too strange for the most

It’s so strange that
Love is not a noun
No one knows at first to hold it down
Ain’t no one’s fault
It’s only my downfall

So Guess I’ll stay away from you
Stay away from you
I’ll stay away from you
I’m too strange for the most

Stay away from you
Ah…..
Love’s so strange

Take it off
Let it go
And Put it down
I’m on the road ahead you’re nothing to me

credits

from There Is A Funeral In My Heart, For Every Man I Loved, released February 14, 2022
Written, Vocals & Production by Fifi Rong
Mix by Oskar Vizan and Fifi Rong
Mastering by Oskar Vizan

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about

Fifi Rong London, UK

Chinese-British vocalist, songwriter, and producer FiFi Rong blends emotional vulnerability and her cultural heritage into her Avant-Pop vision. Known for collaborations with Skepta, Tricky, and more, she's recognised for her paradigm-pushing sound and spellbinding live shows. Currently working on her 7 EP Series "Qi:7," FiFi explores past traumas and cultural ties, fostering a hopeful narrative. ... more

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